How to Deal With Homesickness in a Student (Host Guide)

For host families, exchange student homesickness can come out of nowhere. A student who was bubbly and curious may suddenly seem quieter, overwhelmed, or more eager to call their parents or friends. If you’re hosting a student who feels this way, you’re probably wondering: Is this normal? And how can we help?

The answer is yes; homesickness is completely normal. Most young people living away from home experience some degree of separation stress, especially when adjusting to a new culture and routine. As a host family, your actions can make a big difference in how your student handles these challenges.

In this guide, we’ll break down why students feel homesick, what the science says about cultural adjustment, and the warning signs to look for. We’ll also explain the support AYUSA provides and how to deal with homesickness in a student to help them feel grounded, confident, and more at home.

Understanding Homesickness in International Students

Before you can support a student, it helps to understand what homesickness actually is and why it affects even the most confident, adventurous teenagers.

What Is Homesickness?

Homesickness is a normal emotional reaction to being separated from the people, places, routines, and comforts that make up a student’s everyday life. It often shows up as a mix of sadness, anxiety, or longing for home, and it can also include physical symptoms like trouble sleeping, headaches, or changes in appetite.

Psychologists define homesickness as a form of “separation distress,” a feeling that emerges when someone is removed from their support system and placed in an unfamiliar environment. Researcher Dr. Christopher Thurber, who has studied homesickness in young people for decades, notes that it’s not just missing home; it’s a struggle to adapt to the new while grieving the loss of the familiar.

For foreign exchange students, the transition is even more significant. They’re not just leaving their family and friends; they’re adjusting to a new culture, language, food, and daily rhythm. Even if they’re excited about their exchange year, it’s completely normal for them to feel out of place at first as their brain and emotions work to catch up.

The Science Behind Feeling Homesick

Homesickness has both emotional and biological roots. It ties back to attachment theory, the idea that humans form deep bonds with their caregivers and environments. When those bonds are suddenly disrupted, the brain interprets the change as a loss and triggers stress responses designed to push us back toward what feels safe. 

Our brains love routine. When students leave behind their daily structure (meals at home, their school schedule, and a familiar bedroom), everything becomes unpredictable, which can trigger feelings of anxiety or sadness.

Many international students experience what’s known as the U-Curve of Cultural Adjustment:

• Honeymoon phase: excitement and novelty
• Culture shock: confusion, frustration, and homesickness
• Gradual adjustment: learning routines, feeling more comfortable
• Adaptation: confidence and independence

Homesickness often peaks during the culture shock stage, usually a few weeks into the program.

Why Exchange Students Experience Homesickness

Homesickness isn’t caused by one single thing. For students in study abroad programs, it’s usually the result of several major changes happening all at once: new country, new family, new school, new expectations, and new social dynamics. 

Major Life Transition

Becoming an exchange student is one of the biggest life changes a young person can experience. They leave behind almost everything that feels predictable: 

• Family routines
• School systems
• Their own bedroom
• Their favorite snacks
• How their day normally flows

Suddenly, they’re expected to navigate a new environment, communicate in a different language, and build a life from scratch.

Even for students who are independent and adventurous, this level of transition can be overwhelming. Their confidence may wobble as they face new expectations all at once, which can trigger feelings of uncertainty and longing for the familiarity of home.

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Cultural Differences and Culture Shock

Every country has its own rhythm: how people interact, what they eat, how schools operate, how families structure their days, and even how people express emotions. Small everyday moments (like how Americans greet each other, family rules around chores, or classroom participation styles) can make a student feel out of sync. 

When everything feels “different,” the brain naturally gravitates toward what’s familiar, heightening homesickness. This is part of what’s known as culture shock: the confusion or fatigue that arises when someone is immersed in a new culture. 

Loss of Social Support and Familiar Connections

Back home, students are surrounded by built-in support systems: parents, siblings, best friends, teachers, coaches, and neighbors. They know who to talk to, who to lean on, and where to go when they need comfort. 

When they arrive in a new country, that entire network disappears overnight. When teenagers feel less socially connected, their bodies release more stress hormones like cortisol, and their stress levels may naturally increase until they build new friendships and routines.

Academic or Social Pressure

Exchange students face the same academic and social pressures as American teenagers, but with added layers of complexity. They’re adjusting to a different school system, navigating unfamiliar expectations, and doing it all in a second language. They might worry about keeping up in class or feel self-conscious participating in discussions. 

Socially, they may feel pressure to make friends quickly or to “fit in,” which can become emotionally exhausting. When students feel overwhelmed at school or with peers, homesickness often increases because “home” represents ease, acceptance, and comfort.

Seasonal, Environmental, and Lifestyle Differences

Sometimes homesickness is triggered by factors that host families may not immediately think about. Seasonal and environmental differences, such as colder weather, darker winters, or even the pace of life, can affect a student’s mood and sense of well-being. 

Food differences, mealtime routines, house rules, transportation styles, and expectations around independence can also take time to adjust to. These shifts add up, and when a student feels physically or emotionally out of sync, they may start missing the familiarity of home even more.

Signs a Student May Be Struggling With Homesickness

Homesickness looks different for every student. Some may talk openly about missing home during their academic year in America, while others try to hide their feelings or may not even recognize that homesickness is what they’re experiencing. If you know the common signs, you can gently step in with support before the student feels overwhelmed.

Emotional Signs

One of the earliest signs of homesickness is a shift in mood. Students may seem:

• Sad or tearful
• Irritable or easily frustrated
• Overwhelmed or anxious
• More sensitive than usual

They might express feelings of being “out of place,” or say things like “I miss home,” “I feel lonely,” or “Everything feels strange here.” 

Behavioural Changes

Changes in behavior can be strong clues that a student is feeling unsettled. Look for:

• Wanting to stay in their room more often
• Spending long hours on their phone or online
• Avoiding family activities or meals
• Becoming unusually quiet during conversations
• Preferring to call home excessively

While it’s natural for teens to want some alone time, consistent withdrawal often reflects discomfort or sadness.

Physical Symptoms

Homesickness can show up in the body just as much as in emotions. Teenagers may not always connect physical discomfort with stress or sadness, but host families may notice:

• Trouble sleeping or excessive sleeping
• Headaches
• Stomachaches or nausea
• Fatigue or low energy
• Changes in appetite (eating much more or much less)

Stress hormones can trigger real physical reactions, especially when a student is adjusting to a completely new environment. 

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Academic or Social Changes

Homesickness can also affect a student’s motivation, confidence, and engagement in school or social life. Common signs include:

• Struggling to keep up with schoolwork
• Difficulty concentrating in class
• Loss of interest in activities they normally enjoy
• Trouble making or maintaining friendships
• Avoiding extracurriculars or school events

Because academics and friendships are central to a student’s adjustment, dips in either area are often tied to stress or homesickness. 

How Host Families Can Help Students Through Homesickness

A supportive, patient, and consistent environment helps students feel grounded as they adjust to a new culture and routine. Below are some of the most effective ways host families can ease homesickness and help students feel more comfortable.

Start With Patience, Warmth, and Reassurance

The most powerful things you can offer a homesick student are patience and empathy. Let them know their feelings are normal and that many exchange students experience the same adjustment period.

Simple phrases like “It’s okay to miss home” or “You’re not alone, we’re here for you” can provide immense comfort. Avoid minimizing their emotions or pushing them to “get over it.” Instead, offer gentle reassurance that things will get easier with time, and celebrate their courage in taking on such a big adventure.

Create a Welcoming, Predictable Home Environment

Routine is comforting during times of transition. When students know what to expect (when dinner is served, how weekends usually go, or what family evenings look like), it helps reduce anxiety and builds a sense of stability.

It’s a good idea to:

• Establish regular mealtimes
• Include your student in weekly traditions
• Share family schedules
• Involve them in household tasks

A predictable home environment helps students feel secure and included as they study abroad in the USA, which naturally eases homesickness.

Encourage Communication But Set Healthy Boundaries Around Technology

Talking with their natural family can help students feel connected, but too much contact can make homesickness worse. Encourage students to stay in touch while also helping them build independence.

Healthy approaches include:

• Setting regular (but not constant) times for calls
• Suggesting shorter phone check-ins instead of long video chats
• Encouraging them to talk to you when they’re struggling, not only to people back home

This balance helps students stay connected without staying emotionally “stuck” in their home country.

Help Them Build Connections at School and in the Community

Social connection is one of the strongest buffers against homesickness. You can help by:

• Introducing them to teens in the neighborhood
• Encouraging them to participate in clubs, sports, band, or volunteer groups
• Attending school events together
• Helping them navigate sign-ups or tryouts

Students adjust more quickly when they feel they belong, and friendships are a key part of that. 

Celebrate Culture Sharing in Both Directions

One of the most meaningful parts of hosting is cultural exchange. When students see their culture welcomed and enjoyed, it boosts their sense of identity and comfort.

Try:

• Inviting them to cook a dish from home
• Learning a few words in their language
• Sharing your holidays and traditions
• Creating opportunities for them to share music, movies, or stories from home

Mutual exchange builds trust and deepens the relationship, helping students feel valued.

Keep Your Student Busy With Meaningful Activities

Downtime can amplify homesickness, especially in the early weeks, and research shows that students who are open to new activities are less likely to experience homesickness.

Meaningful activities don’t need to be expensive or elaborate. They can include:

• Running errands together
• Going for walks or hikes
• Visiting a local festival or museum
• Cooking meals as a family
• Weekend day trips
• Joining school spirit events

Being active helps your student build connections and a sense of belonging during their exchange year in the USA. 

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Help Them Build Independence and Confidence

Homesickness often improves as students gain a sense of competence in their new environment. Encourage small steps toward independence:

• Learning public transportation
• Managing their school schedule
• Trying new foods or hobbies
• Making new friends

Celebrate their progress, big or small!

Balance Support With Encouraging Resilience

It’s natural to want to fix things when a student is sad, but over-comforting can unintentionally make homesickness stronger. The goal is to support the student without shielding them from normal challenges.

As a host family for an international student, you can:

• Listen without immediately solving
• Ask questions like, “What do you think would help you feel better?”
• Encourage problem-solving and independence
• Remind them of the strength they’ve already shown by choosing to study abroad

This balance helps students build resilience, which is one of the most valuable outcomes of an exchange year.

When Homesickness Turns Into Something More Serious

Most homesickness is temporary and manageable, especially with patience and support from a host family. But in some cases, students may struggle more deeply or show signs that they’re having trouble adjusting on their own. Below are the signs to watch for and the steps to take when additional support is needed.

Red Flags to Watch For

While mood swings, tiredness, or occasional tears can be normal early in the exchange year, certain behaviors may indicate that a student is facing something more serious than typical homesickness.

Red flags include:

• Persistent withdrawal: The student isolates themselves for long periods, avoids meals, or rarely leaves their room.
• Significant sleep or appetite changes: Either sleeping far too much or struggling to sleep at all, or a dramatic increase or decrease in appetite.
• Refusing school or activities: Repeatedly skipping classes, clubs, or social opportunities.
• Repeated emotional breakdowns: Frequent crying, panic, or feeling overwhelmed.
• Hostility or sharp shifts in behavior: Severe irritability, anger, or mood swings that feel out of character.
• Expressions of hopelessness: Comments like “I can’t do this,” “I want to go home now,” or “Nothing is getting better.”

These signs don’t automatically mean something serious is wrong, but they signal that the student may need a higher level of support than a host family can provide alone.

When to Contact Your Community Representative (CR)

AYUSA Community Representatives are trained to support both students and host families through adjustment challenges. You should reach out to your CR if:

• You see several of the red flags above
• You’re unsure how to respond to a student’s emotional state
• The student’s homesickness isn’t improving despite consistent support
• The student is refusing to attend school or participate in family life
• Conflicts or communication breakdowns are becoming more frequent
• You feel out of your depth or just want some guidance

There’s no downside to contacting your CR early. Even if the situation turns out to be mild, having professional support gives everyone peace of mind and helps prevent small issues from escalating.

Tips for Preventing Homesickness

By laying a strong foundation, many homesickness challenges can be reduced or even prevented altogether.

Set Clear Expectations Early

Clarity creates comfort. Students feel safer and less anxious when they understand how your household works and what you expect of them. During the first few days, take time to explain:

• Daily routines (meals, bedtime, school mornings)
• Household rules
• Chores and responsibilities
• Family values and communication style
• How transportation works
• Your expectations around technology, curfews, and school involvement

When students know what to expect, they can relax more quickly in their new environment.

Establish Routines During the First 1–2 Weeks

The early weeks are critical for anchoring the student in their new life. Predictable routines help your student adjust more quickly to their new environment.

Helpful early routines include:

• Eating dinner together each night
• A set school-day schedule (wake-up, breakfast, transportation)
• Family activities on weekends
• Participation in regular chores, like setting the table or walking the dog
• Quiet hours or study times

The more familiar the rhythm becomes, the less likely the student is to feel overwhelmed or disconnected.

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Encourage Healthy Habits From Day One

A student’s physical well-being strongly influences their emotional resilience. When you host a student, gently guide them toward habits that support a stable, positive adjustment:

• Sleep: Encourage a healthy sleep schedule, especially as they adapt to a new time zone.
• Nutrition: Introduce them to your family’s meals and offer balanced, comforting foods.
• Movement: Invite them to walk the neighborhood, join family hikes, or play a sport.
• Hydration: Many students underestimate how climate changes affect hydration needs.
• School involvement: Help them get connected at school early so routines feel natural.

Small healthy habits strengthen their ability to cope with stress and reduce the intensity of homesickness.

Model Curiosity and Openness

Students take emotional cues from their host families. You might:

• Ask about traditions or holidays from their home country
• Try foods they recommend
• Learn how to pronounce their hometown or favorite dish correctly
• Encourage them to share music, photos, or stories
• Talk openly about cultural differences in a positive, nonjudgmental way

When students feel their culture is valued, they gain confidence and settle in more quickly.

Strategies You Can Gently Encourage

You can also guide your student toward simple strategies that help prevent them from feeling overwhelmed:

• Journaling or keeping a scrapbook of new experiences
• Setting small goals each week (join a club, make one new friend, try a new food)
• Creating a balanced schedule with time for school, rest, and fun
• Practicing communication, such as expressing needs or asking questions
• Limiting early screen time, which can reduce longing for home
• Creating little rituals, like nightly tea, family game nights, or weekend trips

The goal isn’t to control the student’s adjustment; it’s to empower them with tools that make settling in a little smoother.

Remember, AYUSA Is Always Here for You and Your Student!

International student exchange is an incredible experience, but it’s also a journey that comes with its own adjustments, and homesickness is one of the most common challenges students and host families face. 

While AYUSA host families can offer a lot of support to homesick students, you’re never expected to do it alone. We provide host families with ongoing guidance, responsive support, and a caring network of Community Representatives who are trained to help you understand, manage, and overcome these moments of transition. 

Whether you’re noticing early signs of homesickness, unsure how to encourage independence, or just want reassurance that you’re on the right track, we’re only a call or message away. Ready to experience the magic of hosting an exchange student? Start your AYUSA application today!